Dolor Orexis
by Tualha
Summary: Eep. I actually wrote a d/h. What is the world coming to? Anyways, this is going to be a many-chaptered study in styles of fic writing, starting with relatively normal. I bet it sucks, too...Chapter 2 is up, it's a sort of filk to Green Eggs and Ham..
1. Chapter 1: The Shattering Wall

A/N Okay, an odd fic…but I've been reading a lot of them after reading none for a week, so…Again, I was spurred to write this, but this time I planned upon it…that doesn't make much sense, does it? Sorry for all the swearing, I'm in a bad mood.And…um…not much to say here…I think I'm making this a series…

Disclaimer: All characters and settings belong to J. K., and the song lyrics that run through Hermione's head belong to Sarah McLaughlin.My writing belongs to the demon that I sold my soul to when my family got Windows and a PC instead of a Mac. ::sobs in shame::

# Dolor Orexis the 1st: The Shattering Wall

## Tualha

Her blood was boiling, Draco could tell.Her blood was boiling because she hated being forced to stay here.With him.For at least 4 hours.The fact that she was forced to be with him in her beloved library made it that much worse.They both had detention for swearing, and were supposed to reshelf books.Detentions were always horribly menial tasks.Hermione had cracked from loss of sleep and too much homework, and told Draco to "oh, fuck off, Malfoy" when he came to bother them all period in Potions.Malfoy had called her something a tad bit worse than Mudblood in front of McGonagall.The two heads had decided that each would choose their own student's punishment.Their decisions were as follows:

"Really, I don't blame you, Miss Granger I'd probably have done the same in your position" – here they shared a grin – "but self-control is necessary.I'll let you spend the evening in the library, re-shelving.You'll enjoy that, a quiet evening in the library, won't you?I don't want to do anything too harsh…yes, this will be best.I'll let you go in the Restricted Section…" McGonagall's voice had trailed off, and she was scribbling on a parchment form about Hermione's assignment for the night.When Snape was notified of her decision, he presented two choices to Malfoy.Either he could spend the evening doing something he'd truly enjoy, or he could go to the library with Hermione.Draco was rather surprised at the latter choice.Snape reasoning was: "I've seen the way she looks at you, when she's not just glaring at you tiredly, when you're not looking back.She has some opinion of you that would benefit you to know.Either she hates you as much as she always has, if not more, or she's in love with you.If she's smitten, then you have the opportunity to play with her a little, have a little fun.And think how much it'll kill Potter and Weasley," he finished, black eyes glinting.He chanced a glance at Draco's face.There was a smirk upon it, and one eyebrow was raised.His eyes were the only outlets through which one could see his emotions. He'd gone though excessive training for his face to remain indifferent.However, he was definitely amused now.

One thing that you must understand is that where most of us are just sort of there in the ethics department, Draco Malfoy was evil.It was simply his upbringing, some would say.But it wasn't.For example, good was practically a part of Harry Potter's genome.Draco Malfoy had a thread of pure black laced into his DNA.Malice was his nature.A fact that must be accepted.So it was that Draco chose to spend his detention torturing his enemies instead of choosing his own pastime.Snape said that for the same crime, there should be the same punishment, so his proposal was accepted by the powers that be.The professor arranged the date so that his favorite student might have a few days to observe "the quarry".And in this fashion, the time passed, and it became the date of punishment.

Hermione had gotten extra sleep, and done all of her homework at dinner in preparation.She was actually looking forward to detention.Hey, why not?After all, she was going to spend a nice, quiet evening alone in one of her favorite places.Just about the only thing she didn't like about Hogwarts was the fact that there was a distinct lack of privacy.She had grown up an only child, in a large house, with a room to herself.And a large room, at that.Now, she lived in a dorm with people she wasn't even that fond of, but didn't have any space from, not counting the curtains around her bed.So she took alone time when she could get it.That was certainly part of the reason that she was so mad when she ambled into the library, humming, and saw Malfoy there.

"I'm going to say this once, and don't make me talk to you again," she said immediately, eyes closed and neck tensed."I don't want you here, I'm going to try very hard not to talk to you, and I don't want you talking to me.I don't know why you're here, too, but I'm seriously pissed about it, and I just want to get on with my re-shelving, if you don't mind."Malfoy was, of course, still smirking as he always did, and there was a glint of something in his eyes that Hermione couldn't quite identify, but knew for a fact that she didn't like.

"Oh," she added, as an afterthought, "I know I'm going to have to say this, so I'll say it now.Shut up, Malfoy, shut up, Malfoy, shut up, Malfoy, _shut up, Malfoy,_ **shut up, Malfoy,** shut up, Malfoy, SHUT UP, MALFOY!!!!!"

Now, Malfoy would have replied, but the pure acid in Hermione's eyes made him think that it might be better for him not to pique her fury so early in the evening.So, for the next hour or two, Hermione tried to relax, and Malfoy made interesting cat/mouse comparisons about him and the other inhabitant of the room.Madam Pince wasn't there.Even though Malfoy was a teenage boy, and himself at that, McGonagall trusted Hermione to be able to take care of herself.And, normally, she would have been able to.

When the night was growing older, and the detention was nearly done, Malfoy started pondering how he was going to go about his task.Finally, he decided just to dive right in, and, thereabouts of five minutes later did.He abruptly stopped shelving books, and, without a word, grabbed Hermione and kissed her.Predictably, she gasped, and slapped him, hard, her nails leaving little cuts in his cheek.

"How dare you?!" she screamed, nearly at a loss for words.

"Guess," he replied leisurely, leaning back in a chair.When she didn't reply, he continued.

"Or maybe you already know…?"

With those words, there was a visible crumbling behind Hermione's dark brown eyes.A wall supposedly as mighty as China's, as old relative to the situation, but apparently not nearly so enduring, had shattered with one blow.But then, was it really fair?Given the circumstances, a better metaphor might have been a paper screen and a nuke.

"Fine.Fine!" Hermione yelled, losing control, nearly for the first time in her life."Yes, fine, I know!Good God, I know!Yes…yes, I know, damn you.I know how my knees get weak of their own accord when I see you, and how it's all I can do to keep my mind on my work, because of you.I know how whenever I try to work out what I think about you, my stomach becomes a vacuum, and I have to think about something else.I know how I can't keep my mind off you when I'm lying alone at night, and how the only dreams that I seem to be able to remember have you as a main character.I know how I dread ever telling anyone this, because I know how Ron will be furious, and Harry will be hurt, and McGonagall be shocked, and, oh God, I know how whenever I try to get to be alone with my thoughts, you're there."At this point, there was a flicker of fear in Draco's eyes.He'd had no idea just how far this went.But it went farther than that.

"I know…I know how much I used to hate you, used to think you were slime, and now I can't, I just can't.I know how whenever I see you in potions, or any other place, I start feeling sorry for you, because I know what kind of a wonderful person you could have been, if things were different.And I know you too well to do this, and I know how much you're going to hurt me in the end, and I know you won't even give a damn about what happens to me, but I, I can't keep going on like this, I simply can't keep living my life with everything like this happening inside.I'm just not capable of it."

Now, Draco had intentionally hardened his eyes so Hermione couldn't see all that was happening in his head.Seeing this, Hermione thought, of all things, about some song lyrics._You're so beautiful…a beautiful fucked up man._She could only say one thing now.

"Now, I'm just going to say this one more time, but I'm going to add a bit.Shut up and kiss me, Malfoy."

A/N2Okay, so how was it?I'm getting REALLY insecure about this one…so please review?Please?Maybe I should get my cat in here…she can do better guilt trips than I can…Oh well.So, other things.If I really do make this a series, it's going to be in all sorts of styles, like filk and song-fic.Also, any guesses about what the title means?'Tis Latin.


	2. Silver Eyes and Hair

I do not like Green Eggs and Ham. I do not like them, Sam-I-Am!

A/N Okay, oddness, definite oddness.This is the next part of Dolor Orexis, it's a filk of sorts, only not to a song.This is my version of Green Eggs and Ham, so that's where to look for reference...I had to change a bit of the scripting to fit my purposes, but otherwise it's the same sort of format.Er...enjoy, I guess.::shrugs, then starts to walk away, muttering, "Sacrilege.It is *not* sacrilege!I can't believe Emmy thinks it's sacrilege..."::

Disclaimer: All HP characters belong to J. K. Green Eggs and Ham belongs to Dr. Seuss, and this story belongs to Ashitaka in Princess Mononoke.Who belongs to the people who made him up.Dedicated to my friend Emily who made this story at least halfway legible.Oh, something you might want to know: this is a conversation between Hermione and Fate.Fate is the italics.The "silver eyes and hair" guy is Malfoy.

Dolor Orexis II: Silver Eyes and Hair Tualha 

_ _

_Fate-Is-There._

_There-Is-Fate._

_ _

"That Fate-Is-There, that Fate-Is-There, I do not like that Fate-Is-There."

_Do you like silver eyes and hair?_

"I do not like him, Fate-Is-There.I do not like silver eyes and hair."

_Would you like him here or there?_

_ _

"I would not like him here or there.I would not like him anywhere.I do not like silver eyes and hair.I do not like him, Fate-Is-There."

_Would you like him in a house?_

"I would not like the little louse.I would not like him in a house.I would not like him here or there.I would not like him anywhere.I do not like silver eyes and hair.I do not like him, Fate-Is-There."

_Would you like him in a box?_

"I would not like him in Fort Knox!Not in a box.Not in Fort Knox.Not in a house.Not *that* little louse.I would not like him here or there.I would not like him anywhere.I do not like silver eyes and hair.I do not like him, Fate-Is-There!"

Would you?Could you?The way he is?Take him!Take him!Here he is!

"I would not, could not the way he is.Not in a box.Not in Fort Knox.Not in a house.Not *that* little louse.I would not like him here or there.I would not like him anywhere.I do not like silver eyes and hair.I do not like him, Fate-Is-There!"

You may like him.You will see.You may like him.Come with me!

(Fate brings Hermione to the Slytherin common room where people look around at her in a bewildered fashion.Hermione makes stuttering excuses.)

"I would not, could not, that's not me!Not like he is!You let me be!I would not like him in a box.I would not like him in Fort Knox.I would not like him in a house.I would not like *that* little louse.I would not like him here or there.I would not like him anywhere.I do not like silver eyes and hair.I do not like him, Fate-Is-There!"

_Alone!Alone!Could you, would you, all alone?_

"Not all alone!Not him with me!Not me with him, Fate, let me be!I would not like him the way he is!I would not like him in a box.I would not like him in Fort Knox.I would not like him in a house.I would not like *that* little louse.I would not like him here or there.I would not like him anywhere.I do not like silver eyes and hair.I do not like him, Fate-Is-There!"

Say!In the dark?Here in the dark!Would you, could you, in the dark?

"Oh, God!I would not, could not, in the dark!"

_Would you, could you, in the rain?_

"No, Fate, no!He's such a pain!Not in the rain.Not in the dark.Not all alone.Not the way he is.I do not like him, Fate, you see.I would not like him in a box.I would not like him in Fort Knox.I would not like him in a house.I would not like *that* little louse.I would not like him here or there.I would not like him anywhere.I do not like silver eyes and hair.I do not like him, Fate-Is-There!"

_You do not like silver eyes and hair?_

"I do not like him, Fate-Is-There."

_Would you, could you, on a lark??_

"I would not, could not, on a lark.Not in the rain.Not in the dark.Not all alone.Not the way he is.I would not like him in a box.I would not like him in Fort Knox.I would not like him in a house.I would not like *that* little louse.I would not like him here or there.I would not like him anywhere.I do not like silver eyes and hair.I do not like him, Fate-Is-There!"

You do not like him, so you say.Try him!Try him!And you may.Try him and you may, I say.

_ _

"Fate!If you will let me be, I will try him.You will see."

(With a resigned and exasperated look, Hermione kisses a very confused Draco.)

"Say!I do like silver eyes and hair!I do!I like him, Fate-Is-There!And I would kiss him on a lark.And I would kiss him in the rain.And I would kiss him in the dark, and all alone, and the way he is.He is so cute, so cute, you see!I would kiss him in a box, and I would kiss him in Fort Knox, and in a house, even if he is a little louse.I would kiss him here or there.I would kiss him anywhere!I do so like silver eyes and hair.Thank you!Thank you, Fate-Is-There!"

A/N2 See, now wasn't that odd?You can replace "kiss" with anything you'd like, I just used that for lack of a better phrase.What'd you think?You can tell me in a review, and Dr. Seuss, for one, would appreciate it…


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